Rules of attraction, of love lectures, of cafe life

No. I wouldn't have caught your eye a second time. Intelligence has never been trendy, not in a bodily way. You wouldn't have stayed overnight if I hadn't tried so hard, worked so fucking good on my superficial performance. When the funparty make up is all washed off, when routine and everyday life becomes permanent tenants in our life... You liked having someone else, someone more modest, moderate underneath you, didn't you?

I feel nothing but contempt and disdain against you all - your false pretentions, your plattitudes and cheap rhetorics. There's nothing beyond those words, you never behave differently. (You claim that attraction reside in your body, your genitals, hence is natural, is right, is the only unchangeable way.)

You don't think I see all this? You think I'm so darn liberated that I don't care? And then the blaming sequences come, causing rivalry between my sisters and me. What's the use of pretending that beauty exists outside these rigid boundaries? I should use my energy for transcendence.